Closure

clo·sure (klō'zhər) n.
1. The act of closing or the state of being closed.
A bringing to an end; a conclusion: finally brought the project to closure.
A feeling of finality or resolution, especially after a traumatic experience.


~~

No need to hold on to the past. False hope isn't hope at all.

It's in the bag. Tied in a knot. And tossed in the dumpster.

Time to move on. Hope for new things. A healthy hope.

Poetry Shuffle

It's out with the old and in with the new,
Another night slips away,
Don't go changing to try and please me.
What is the meaning of life?
What am I gonna be when I grow up?
You are my Father,
Your heart will always be my home.

Hello Mr. Dark Cloud,
Trying to pretend that you're okay
Tears are falling, hearts are breaking.
Can we get back to where we started?
Everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.

It's so important to make someone happy,
Then try and face this mountain.
I've been thinking lately about you;
It's a world of difference when faith is in her heart.

~~~~~

Don't try to read anything into it. This poem was created by putting all the music on my Mp3 on shuffle and writing down the first line as I skipped through the first 16 songs. Pretty cool, how it kinda flows, at least part of the time.
This was an activity I did with my teens this afternoon for Teen Read Week. It was fun :D

Whoosh!!!

I feel like I say it often, but the days really do seem to be flying by so much faster than normal! It truly feels like it was yesterday was the first of October and I was shocked. Now the month is half over! Wow!

Anyhow. I'm busy busy at work. Today has been a little slower and a nice breather. Here is a link to see some of the stuff I have been working on recently. (Teen Read Week is next week)

Well, I must rush off... I must make sure the clock isn't skipping time or the calendar skipping days. They have a tendency to do that!

It's one of those...

...lazy feeling days. It was a struggle to get out of bed! I feel as though I need a weekend to catch up on sleep from my weekend. On my lunch break I headed to Starbucks.

In the drive through:
Me: "I would like a double venti caramel latte, please."
Barista: "Okay... that drink already has 2 shots of espresso."
Me: "Yes"
Barista: "You want more added?"
Me: "Yes"
Barista: (hesitantly) "Okay... how many?"
Me: "Two" (the reason I said 'double' in the first place! lol)
Barista: "Wow! Alright. Pull around."

It sure tastes good :D And I will either be perkier or shaky(er) soon!! Maybe both. :)

newness

Here are a handful of new things I have recently tried:

• Cooking and eating fried green tomatoes ~ fairly yummy, planning to give them a second shot tonight.
  
• Cutting the pad of my index finger open with scissors ~ ouch! no, I didn't do it on purpose!
  
• Enjoyed an unscheduled informal tour through the rear offices of the Post Office
  
• Bent over on the street corner and dug through the mail box looking for something I no longer wanted mailed ~ long story
  

By request... for Mrs. B

Oh, Hallelujah!!! :D Got it :) Currently going to Word to finish. Be back soonish.

So so many things! I'm not sure where to start, what to include, what to brush over, what to forget. I make no promises on the flow or 'understandability' of this post :) But here is something for what few readers are left out there.

Why do people lie about their age? Have you ever lied about your age? When? On what? I have stretched the truth when it came to my weight but age? Hey it's possible as I keep getting older I will be hesitant to share but I don't think I would lie about it.
You may wonder why I even bring this up. At work one of the many things I do is keep up a MySpace page and Facebook for the teens. It has information about our library, pictures, a search link for our online catalog, posts about upcoming teen events, etc.I have recently been requesting more friends based on a pile of surveys taken in the schools. I searched their emails they gave to us and added them.
Anyhow, the majority of these 14 and 15 year old kids had put their age on their MySpace profile as 19, 20, and 21. A few of them even claimed to be 26 and 32. Why? What is attractive about being 'so old'? I can understand a 13 year old thinking it would be cooler to be 17 or 18, but 22? 26? Hmm. I don't know. If you have insight do share. You know what is even odder... some of these had 19 on their profile but then over in the "about me" section they told that they were 14 or they gave their full birthdate. I think someone is confused! I know I am.

~~

I never dreamed I would be so busy at this point in my life. College life is over, right, no more papers to write. I'm working a 30-hour job. Not so difficult. I was so afraid I would be so sad and alone (those moments do come at times) all the time; instead I feel like I'm running crazy. It is a good crazy though I think. Every weekend for the last while and several coming up there is something going on. Here's a semi-quick overview...

I got back from NM on the 2nd right.

Aug 8 I was home at my family's in Salem and at friends spending time.
Aug 15 Stayed over again, and spent all day Saturday canoeing on the Meramec River. So fun!Aug 22 My brothers stayed with me and went to Hunter's Ed we had a lot of fun Friday night... Saturday I took them home and we all (my whole family) went to the Hot Air Balloon Fest in Centralia and celebrated the twins b'day
Aug 29 Celebrating my Mom's b'day with a bunch of ladies who came and stayed at my apt Friday night and we did fun things together. Sunday was full too with an extra service thrown in the afternoon. I got to see some people I hadn't seen in a long time. Very nice time. Very nice music. Oh ... and remind me.. I have more comments about this experience a bit later.
Sept 5 Planning to spend the whole long weekend in Cincinnati visiting long lost friends, going to the Rennaisance Festival (remember, I went last year), watching fireworks, and enjoying the road trip there and back with my bro, Tim. I'm really looking forward to this. I will do my best to take my camera and actually remember to use it :)

(( btw … this is where I thought I lost it and am carrying on now where I left off, in case you were curious ))

Sept 12 not sure yet, seems there is something I’m forgetting, we’ll see.

~~

So about my Sunday afternoon…. I don’t think I have ever had déjàvu as much as I had then. We were driving along and some in the group were talking about when they had been to this camp before and what year it was, etc. I said I had never been there before. End of story. Until, WHAM! We drive onto the campground. “Oh I have definitely been here before!!!” It was so odd, and cool and weird and yeah!I have a really good memory. I have very clear memories of specific events that happened when I was very very young. I think one of my first memories is when I was 2½ years old. But I remember more things around the time I turned 5. Anyhow. I’m not sure how old I was when I went to the Cresthaven campground (whatever it was called 20-odd years ago). But I remember being a brat! lol. I remember being in the dorms and was being babysat during a meeting or something the adults were busy with and I gave the girls watching me such a hard time! I remembered being in the tabernacle. I remember swinging on that very swing-set and drinking at that same water-fountain station. Anyhow. Crazy!

~~

Wow, this is getting insanely long. I apologize. But hey, you don’t have to be insane enough to read the whole thing unless you really want to! :P
Well, there is more. But I should stop eventually. I think I have uncovered things in my life that are trivial to most and should have been left unsaid. But, I tend to be an open-book most of the time. Especially if you are there to listen or read. Or if I have been alone long enough and am tired of being quiet… like right now. I will just ramble on.
Gonna go before it gets worse, or is that even possible? ;)

~Esther

:(

Oh grrr grrrrr grrrrrr! When will I learn. I spent 45 minutes typing a post and just accidentally lost it all! There is no way I wanna take the time to retype and try to remember what I even said. SIGH I need to type posts in Word first. Jo, I should learn from you. I'm bummed. Okay. Getting over it. I hope you all love this nice post I just typed in 3 minutes. I will let you try to think up the possible topics that were in the post I typed earlier.

I will try to get something better soon.

:-/

busy night at the library!

"Excuse me, Ma'am, your son is tearing the signs off our bookshelves!" (!!!!! ahem... that's Greek for 'Please watch him!')

Oh the lovely things (and lil creatures!) that come along at work!

Hi

It’s been awhile, I know! So here is an attempt to catch up on a few things.

I was in New Mexico for a week again this summer. It was my third time to go down there and help with the Keep Youth Camp. I am getting more and more attached to those kids. God really helped us this year and we survived without too many major issues.

Now that I’m back I’m starting to get settled in my new apartment. (Oh yeah, didn’t I tell you… roomies are gone… I’m in a single apt now.) It is different living alone. I have always either been in a huge, loud, family or a huge, loud, dorm! And living with Jo and Rach was... hehe!!

I still have decorating and rearranging to do, but I’m getting used to ‘my home.’ The whole alone part of it is slowly getting better too. God is really helping me! I want to use this time in my life to deepen my relationship with Jesus. It has also been nice that my family and many friends live within an hour away. I have spent time in Salem on the weekends doing a lot of fun things.

My job is going good. It has finally slowed down a little since the Summer Reading Program is over. There is still a lot to do. I am already starting to do a little planning for next summer. Sounds like the SRP will be my responsibility next year! Scary! But exciting.

Well, I think I will close for now. I borrowed a library laptop and am at home borrowing internet connection. ;) It has been iffy at best so this is getting typed on Word. Let’s see if I can get it posted.

Here I am in my kitchen with my new work shirt :D I took it just now on my cell.
It's definitely late! tada

My Thoughts, Cares, and Prayers....

are with many people in many places....

Illinois
Nebraska
New Mexico
Nevada
Ohio


for many reasons.